Shannon's Kitchen

healthy food. inappropriate language. zero fucks given.


Shannon’s Kitchen’s Facebook page received a request to horn up broccoli. I love broccoli, I have ever since my mum manipulated me into it by assuring me they were magic little trees, the cunning shit. Why couldn’t she have introduced me to magic mushrooms as well? Anyway, while I am a broco-lover, I am aware of the existence of broco-loathers, and I respect their views (unlike salted-caramel haters, who deserve a punch in the nipps and the slow, painful removal of their tasting apparatus). Broco-loathers, calm your tits and believe that there are ways to make this healthy, cruciferous, green fucker taste positively horned up.

Ingredients: (to douse on two servings of broccoli)

– 1 egg yolk

– 2 teaspoons Dijon mustard

– a dash of the milk of your choice (I like coconut milk)

– a small handful of pine nuts

Horn it up time:

– whisk the yolk, Dijon mustard and coconut milk together

– pour it on your cooked cruiciferous bizz

– get the nuts on that shit

– rejoice

If you don’t do raw egg yolk, bad luck and it sucks to be you,

Shannon x

2 thoughts on “Horned Up Broccoli

  1. Ellie-Mae says:

    My mum told me broccoli was any heads. Maybe if she said it was trees I’d like it more.

  2. Ellie-Mae says:

    Fuck it. Ant heads, she said broccoli was ant heads.

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